Thoughts of the Torn Guard

Keynote speech presented at Beyond Vanilla 2011

By Vince Andrews

I will be honest; I wrote more than one draft of this document. It wasn’t because I couldn’t think of what to say, rather it was because I couldn’t decide which topic was most important. That’s a hard thing to decide when you see so many things going on at once.

The year 2011 may seem like it will go down in the history of our culture as a very pivotal time for us, but it’s really not. This idea of course is being pressured by others in position to take advantage of the larger stage and begin planting the seeds to our concerns. I don’t think this was intentionally reckless, I just wish they would have had a better game plan than what was shown.

The truth is, the temperature has been rising for all of us on a social level for many years and has only just recently been coming to a head. I will not mislead you; we have only just begun to discuss openly the very serious issues that plague our Leather culture.

It is not just a few issues either, there are many of them. So many that you really can’t give each issue the time it deserves in a Keynote. A fact I think some people forget. Our society these days expect to have everything given to them instantly and clearly, however when it comes to culture and social issues it is just not that simple.

Some of what I am about to say will determine my future. Not the future, just mine.

I have seen many keynotes over the years give passion and breed anger. I assure you I have no intentions of either. I do however intend to give you my thoughts in brief, on some of the things we as a Leather culture are struggling with today.

So let’s just get to the point shall we?

History…You know there is a saying about history: “To the victors go the spoils.” Well in our case it’s the survivors that the spoils go to. Allow me to explain.

There are tons of people running around this lifestyle preaching, writing and being hand fed honors just because they are over the age of 50- most of them creating their own history and circulating their own ideas for their own agendas, forcing us to consider that it is time to start looking at leather years not living years; and I mean the documented ones.

It is a proven fact that the bigger the lie, the more people will believe it, and in the short time I have been a part of this Leather Culture, I have heard more lies than truths. I have witnessed people teaching history classes on hanky codes when I personally only just a year prior explained to this same individual what the colored strips meant on leather vests and pants.

I have witnessed writers publish books of history based on the settings of fictional jerk off novels of the gay leather culture’s past, or worse, their own personal jerk off fantasies and tales. I have observed adoration given to new strangers with farfetched stories and the rewards of recognition given to those that dismiss accountability. I have witnessed greed driving the passion of some and political pressure placed on those that question the actions of others.

You know what drives me more insane isn’t that these people are doing this, it’s that we as members of this Leather Culture actually accept it.

We all read books written on relationships by authors with no background in psychology or sociology. Anyone can get a PHD on any subject that earns them the right to place DR. at the forefront of their name, however that doesn’t mean they have a background in mental health. Yet we shell out the money for the material and never once consider the credentials of that person who wrote it.

We should start asking questions about their credentials people. Sure my father had lots of wisdom on marriage to share, that didn’t mean it was healthy.

We all buy books authors write on history, thinking that the “OLD GUARD” secrets will be found in its pages. Most of these books are not written by educated historians, they are not written by men or women with degrees in sociology or anthropology. At the very least, these authors are not even giving us the expected academic respect of providing REFRENCES! We all went to high school; we all know you can’t cite fact without reference.

There are existing publications that contain the reality of our histories. Don’t be swayed by false prophets of secrecy; even the Freemasons have a documented history. We must start requiring the references and show these individuals we have more self respect for our history, beliefs and ourselves than they do. Its one thing when a person writes about their own personal lives, they call them “Memoirs” or an “Autobiography”- both are academically expected to be slighted toward the author’s own views. It’s another thing to consider their personal accounts as overall social history. Societies that have followed this pattern in our past have always been misguided to sometimes socially destructive means.

I see us going down that road and I cringe at the idea.

Truthfully these authors and presenters should be ashamed, but the taste of popularity is so sweet, they can’t walk away. The money and perks are just too much to give up; yet we all agree knowledge should be passed freely. It is our responsibility to cut them off before they begin to taste the pleasure of their false works.

If we as a society want insight on the gay leather culture, then read the writings of people like Geoff Mains, an anthropologist, that wrote Urban Aboriginals; A man that defined Leather as “an affectation of the soul”. We should not be looking toward the famous jerk off novel, “The Leatherman’s Handbook”, by Larry Townsend. This is a man that was looked down upon for printing this book by the previous generation of Leathermen to himself.

While Larry’s history is far more exciting than writing erotic stories, it saddens me that all we remember of his work is one book. The man’s work in the late 60’s and early 70’s with H.E.L.P is hardly spoken of and should not go dismissed. But yet, we focus on his erotica for history- something that was surely never intended.

We fly the colorful flag of our Culture at every event, both Gay and Straight, and yet most of you don’t even take in consideration the ideas of the man that created it with regard to coming Generations of our youth. We forget he was a man that understood the rising youth of the mid 1980’s that surely applies today as much as it did in his time.

Tony once wrote, “The Older elements must recognize that today’s youth is, by and large, more experienced and knowledgeable than similarly aged leathermen were 20, 10 and 5 years ago. Similarly the enthusiastic young must recognize that no matter how much experience they now have they still have a hell of a lot to learn! No matter what age none of us know it all.” Drummer issue 130

Simply put, don’t under estimate our youth and never overlook the input of elders. Each of us is responsible to ourselves to uphold this value and insure its balance.

As for history, if we want to learn our Leather history, then we must be prepared to research and strive to meet the academic standard. The first step is to understand that there are TWO types of Leather cultural histories at play.

To understand Gay Leather Culture, we must understand Gay history as a whole. The Gay Culture over the 1900’s was traumatic and very emotionally deep. Their desire to socialize as a collective group faced by a majority of the population’s ideals of morality was a factor. The male sexual appetite of men as beings and their natural predatory instinct was a factor. The male emotional hunger for a fraternal bond was a factor. Later, this Culture manifested a new society that was driven by its very sexual nature to take risks in hope to live without fear in the future. In the pages of all this history you will find the slow progressive seeds that created the Gay Leather Culture.

I know that all people are gifted with the ability to recognize what is rational and logical. It is the society that people live in that allows them to exploit or repress this activity.

Don’t you all notice people keep going back to the same question basic questions? “When did it start?”, “Why do we say this all started with WWII?” and “What happened between that time and the Vietnam generation?” “Why didn’t it start with WWI, or the Spanish American War or even the civil war? What was so special about the end of WWII?”

There is an answer to that question and I am going to make you find it yourself. It is no coincidence that the Gay Leather Culture was strongest in the port cities of our nation. I will give you a hint: not everyone was able to go home heroes. Some were given the “slip”.

The reason why I am focused on this right now is because I have had enough of hearing a distorted version of our history, especially when people can’t even recognize the contributions of each social group within the many generations that formed the Leather Culture we know today.

Are you giving credit to the Veterans? Well which ones? Which wars are you talking about? Are you giving credit to the Beatniks? Are you giving credit those whom rioted the streets for civil equality and marched on the capitols of our cities? Maybe you’re crediting the men that were just party animals enjoying the freedom of the ride on America’s highways that were still new and ready to be explored. Are you recognizing the social impact of the lost Gay Leathermen that was massacred by AIDS?

Well, who? Who are we talking about?

The Leather culture embodies two orientations on the majority these days: Gay and Heterosexual- two worlds joined together by the actions of one single generation. This is a generation that wanted to march on the world and demand rights and equality for all. This is a generation that saw a chance to merge two Cultural worlds together to create a larger voice and expand their legislative power. A generation that took great strides to create organizations that would house this mighty voting power. This is a generation that still makes up our older members of our Leather culture today.

They are the baby boomers: both Gay and Straight. The Gay Leather Culture of our past under estimated I think the sheer numbers they were inviting to this merging of cultures in the mid 1980’s. They never considered the imbalance in numbers.

You would think that the Generation that always preached 10% would have the smarts to run the numbers. If 10% of the population is considered to be gay, then I theorize only 3% are kinky within that number and 1% are into SM. You equate that same type of mathematics to the Heterosexual community and you got a shit load more people. You have to admit the ambitious idea was a good one politically at the time, just too bad they never actually had a game plan beyond their initial desire of legislative change.

How do you keep from getting swallowed up by the numbers coming through the door?

We are taught to blame the Internet for this mass movement of entry, when the truth is the Gay Baby Boomers had already set the foundation many years prior. I don’t think the Gay Leather men and women ever considered that socially the Gay and Straight Communities were incompatible. Our social pasts are not the same and will never be the same.

Who we fuck does matter; that Generation of Gay Men and Women were just focused on the way we fucked. I mean come on folks, what is the principal reason that binds us together? What the hell are you buying in that vendor room? It isn’t bibles; its gear, hardware and sex toys. The Boomer Generation of Gay men and women forgot that sex in general was a political issue for them; this was not and still is not the case for heterosexuals.

I go to the events and I hear the gay men and women all bitching about how the Heterosexuals are taking over. How Gays are losing their space and demanding the space back. Well don’t bitch at the Heterosexuals, point your anger at the people that publicized and opened the doors of our world and events.

Ask them why.

You can bitch about the heterosexuals, but you can’t blame them; it was strictly an invitation that brought them. The gay men and women of our Leather Culture were the ones that did it, whether for coin or activism, the fact remains that they invited this integration and advocated for it. These Gay Leather men and women gave keynotes and speeches as titleholders and leaders. They pushed bylaw changes and created the organizations to host this new cultural mix. They altered contests rules and forced the agenda with what they felt was the right agenda. And they made sure to pass these principles on to the next generation. My Generation, the X Generation.

I stand in agreement to their overall idea, but not the unstable environment it created.

Here’s an interesting thought for you all: Anyone wonder why those Gay men and women that were activist during the late 1980’s on SM are the same that now give keynotes on reversing their own work on our cultural integration? What’s the matter, they didn’t like the result so now they want to take it back? I don’t think so! You reap what you sew.

These Gay men and women demanded the doors be open and they made this cultural mess; now they can help clean it up. Take responsibility for their actions and decisions and stop riding the popular wave to retain their credibility. I’m not saying this Generation of Gay men and women were bad people, but they are trying to ignore or more seriously, erase their own major contribution. One, I theorize, they were warned about by the older generation and would never have pulled off had AIDS not impacted and removed so many Gay male voices. When faced with tragedy and opportunity, they sprinted to the gates of freedom.

Most importantly we as Gay men and women will have to learn to live with the decision of our past leaders that made the choices to put this all in motion. Yes, that includes me. What they did was no small achievement regardless of how we or I feel about the outcome.

On the other spectrum, Heterosexuals as a collective must admit they truly will never be able to understand what Gay Leather culture is like. Truth is, we as Gay men and women should not blame them for their inability to understand. Heterosexuals are the majority and it’s impossible to truly sympathize with a minority. We as Gay Leather men and women should however admire their desire to identify with some of the challenges facing our community and take that into consideration before passing swift judgment.

Blame is on all sides and the fact is: we are where we are and we need to figure out how to move forward. We need to respect each other’s space and accept our differences. In our culture integration of orientation should be used to advance our sexual freedom, otherwise segregation of our orientation is a healthy, logical and rational way to live.

I am not leaving my Heterosexual friends, but I do want to ride with my brethren!

The largest thing that concerns us as Gay men and women in our time is: “Why a culture that could never truly lived and walked in our shoes would want to adapt or co-opt our cultural traditions and beliefs?” There is a reason why Heterosexual’s on Fetlife debate the simple idea of “What is Leather?” They’re all trying to view it in gay eyes and apply it to themselves. It doesn’t work, they’re not gay.

Yet all the foundations that they all throw out there for a definition come from both the Gay leather culture and Gay history. The Heterosexual Culture has a sexual history of their own and they need to start working on putting back together that rich resource of information. They must start preserving their own history.

The Heterosexual publication history is far more accessible than the Gay culture’s. Their artwork of erotica is far more extensive. The Heterosexual pioneers out there out number our Gay Leather pioneers and they do not just encompass the Marque De Sade. I think there are many overwhelming reasons that they don’t take on this project. One of them is their obsession with understanding the Gay Leather Culture. I think they are searching for themselves within our history. Truth is, their culture laid the legislative groundwork for the Gay Leather Culture to exist. They broke the legislative strangle on publication, and distribution a major factor in Gay Leather needs.

Sadly over the years they have lost their knowledge of their own roots. They must act and act now to preserve it because Gay men and women are not going to.

Realize that by continuing to co-opt our gay leather culture, Heterosexuals are setting the stage to obliterate any potential for heterosexual leather to have its own identity. We have reached the point that if heterosexual leather culture doesn’t claim its own identity, through chronicling and documentation, it will forever be considered a stepchild of the Gay Leather community.

The future is not print publication. Books are being thrown away and don’t think the publication companies are going to find the books on Heterosexual deviant sexual history and convert them all into digital! These Companies are going to decide themselves what to salvage and the Heterosexual Leather Community is the minority within their own Heterosexual world. It will go to the trash.

To just ignore their own history as Heterosexuals is criminal. They should take initiative to learn their own culture and stop living in the fantasy books and fictional writings of both Gay and Heterosexual erotic authors. Fictional authors are paid to make stuff up! The truth is far more romantic and rewarding. If we have to expand the LA&M, we will!

I was once asked what “Leather” meant at an NLA meeting. Well to me it meant sex. Now you have people taking that word and defining it to the breaking point. Some say its spiritual, a journey, tradition, brotherhood, values, ethics, protocols and the list just goes on and on. The thing to remember is that these are the Genesis of Gay leather culture, not the definition of the word used to define the men and women within it.

I have to agree with Guy on this one- it was sexy; however I would say that it came about because of visual connectivity of the outerwear to the sexual activity of the persons wearing it. Yes, things are just that damn simple.

Regardless, it was still SEX!

We have serious issues that are weighing on our overall Leather culture and we have to start putting focus on resolution not division. There will come a day when we will need to rejoin our numbers and burning this bridge is a mistake.

Yes, it’s going to take time and effort to get where we need to be. It is going to require people to take stands, be accountable and stop worrying about the political repercussions of our statements or actions.

We are the Torn Guard; torn by myth and reality, torn by orientation and heritage, torn by loyalty and exploration, we are the X Generation, the next keepers of our history.

Oh I almost forgot, as for scene names…Seriously?!…With all this in mind, who really gives a shit?

Vince Andrews, is a hard working Leatherman dedicated to providing education and support to the community. He has volunteered his services and dedicated his time to a broad range of projects. He has helped various leather clubs throughout the country with their diverse formation and structuring needs. He has helped with tasks like designing club logos, creating or revising by-laws, and the creation and distribution of published media to publicize organizations and their events. Vince has always been known for his organizational work and restructuring abilities.

Most recently Vince served as President of NLA-International for over four years (2006–2010) overseeing one of the Leather community’s oldest and historically respected organizations. During his term as President he worked to restructure and revitalize the NLA-International, as well as create new innovations for its many Chapters.

In his past Vince has participated in many educational leather classes and is known for being very passionate about education in the leather lifestyle. His presentations include, revitalizing organizations, art of gay cruising past and future, Boot Worship as well as many topics on being a leatherboy. His list of accomplishments and involvement include, Co-founding the first Wichita Leather Pride, Co-founder of W.O.O.L.F., Former President of KC boys, Former writer for the Midwest Bound’s Fetish Forum, writer for KC Exposures, Lifetime Member of NLA-I, Assoc Member KC boys, Assoc Member KC Pioneers, Author of “The Leatherboy Handbook” published in both Germany and the US, Creator of the IMsL sashes and BootBlack patches for 2005–2007. He has also created and designed several state, and regional belts and sashes.

Vince still volunteers his time for local and regional needs. He is renowned for his illustrative artwork that he donates to worthy causes across the country.